Two figures hurtled through a scarred green warp tunnel underneath the skin of the universe toward the lost planet of the silver skull machine. The Super Wizard From Space was leading the way, encased in a cocoon of hard light that protected him from the rigors of space travel. His companion, a filthy bearded hermit, followed close behind in a similar light cocoon, though his seemed discolored and misshaped around the edges.
"Are we getting close?" the hermit asked with anxiety. "Pete's old rocket-ship is slow, but he had a long head start! We might still beat him there taking a faster path... do you think we're almost there?"
"Yes, Gavrilo. We will be arriving in the hidden galaxy in mere space-moments," the super wizard said in an authoritative voice. He looked back over his shoulder at the hermit. "Now tell me about the cosmic tournament and why its being kept a secret from me."
Gavrilo hesitated, that firm stare causing him to rein back a bit. An unflinching stare that had witnessed the death of worlds. But he swallowed back his fear, remembering that he was armed with the knowledge of the super wizard's name; his harrowing powers were as harmless to Gavrilo as Gavrilo's own powers were to him.
And he remembered the silver skull machine. The time machine. His chance to literally erase all his past mistakes. Soon.
"The great super-civilizations of outer space were on the brink of super-space-war over your... I mean... your act against the space-unicorns and the space-sasquatches."
"The genocide," the super wizard acknowledged.
Gavrilo shivered. "Um, yes. The planet cracking. Instead of super-space-war, a tournament was suggested. A cosmic tournament. Between space-champions."
"Which space-champions?"
"All of them. All other space-champions. Against you."
"And our own race, the Super Wizards From Space, they didn't warn me."
The super wizard turned away before Gavrilo had a chance to meekly nod in agreement. No one had warned him. No one had wanted to warn him. And had Gavrilo not made a deal with him, he wouldn't be warning him now.
Another mistake that could soon be undone when he got to the machine.
"But the cosmic tournament has rules," the hermit wizard offered after a silence. "Four unbreakable rules. The Invisible Monks insisted."
The super wizard frowned, and looked back.
"The first rule is that space-champions must accept a challenge from any other space-champion. They wanted to make sure you couldn't avoid it, you see..." Gavrilo started to explain before biting his tongue. "The... the second rule is that each challenge is a battle between the two super-civilizations. The others cannot interfere." Not that their own race had any intentions of assisting the super wizard. "The third rule, each challenge must be witnessed by a space-champion. A third one. That is not involved in the fight." To be sure, when it was over. To be certain. "And the fourth rule, the winner of any challenge is the one who..."
The green tunnel boomed with deafening thunder and twisted chaotically. Red space-laser reflected off the edges and splintered into space-lightening arcs around them. The already invasive warp tunnel bubbled around the edges and unravelled in tears and chunks, suddenly expelling the two wizards back into outer space.
In the fresh blackness, more red lines bolted past them terrifyingly close. Rocks and boulders tumbled randomly around them lazily, providing some make-shift cover. The shredded rags of reality mended the burned green tunnel slowly, the fading warp effect causing the rock debris onto erratic paths that threatened to squash the wizards.
"Asteroid field!" shouted the super wizard, trying to orient himself. "Take cover!"
Another red space-laser. An especially large boulder split in two. Gavrilo and the Super Wizard From Space scrambled behind an egg-shaped rock as various chunks spun off in every direction, starting a deadly chain reaction of crashing rocks. A shallow crater on the crater provided a temporary hiding spot from the debris and laser fire.
"Ha ha ha," a transmission crackled to life, "I ain't done no sniping since I was a little larva, but you hafta admit, my aim is nigh on incredible! Ha ha ha!"
"Pete?" Gavrilo spat back in radio waves. "Is that you, you traitorous tako?"
"Course it's me! Who else'd be ambushing you out in an unmapped nowhere? I knew you to be a penniless coward, but I worried you could be a persistent penniless coward. That's why I had someone keeping an eye on you, in case you found yourself some gumption!"
Gavrilo cursed silently under his breath. Looking beside him, he made pretend-gunfire motions to his companion. Gavrilo's power was completely powerless against the alien octopus because Cephalo Pete knew the hermit wizard's name. But he didn't know the Super Wizard From Space's.
The Super Wizard From Space shook his head and whispered, "He's moving around, keeping the sun directly behind his rocket-ship. I can barely see him." He pointed to the far end of the boulder they were on. "I'll get a better vantage point. Get him to fire again, the space-laser beams will show me his position."
"You want me to be a target?"
"Only if you really want to get to that time machine before your former friend," the super wizard tossed back as he crawled away.
The silver skull machine. It wasn't too late. Pete hadn't made it down to the planet yet.
"You ain't died over there, have you?" Cephalo Pete taunted.
"I'm still here, Pete." Think. Think. There was one thing that got Cephalo Pete to lose his temper. Only question was whether he thought the hermit wizard had come alone, or saw that he was being baited. "Still here. Alive and uncooked."
A long silence on white static.
"That's how the smart ones stay alive, isn't it Pete? We stay in our hole when danger is about? You'd have to be pretty damn stupid to go crawling out of your safe hole when there's who-knows-what outside."
"You best quiet up now," was the sharp reply.
"I'd have to be damn blind to not see danger outside my hole. To just go crawling out onto the rocks when someone's out looking for me. I'm liable to get myself bagged up and carted off, ain't I Pete?"
"I done told you to shut up, damn your hide!"
Gavrilo risked a peek over over the rim of the crater, letting a smirk free. "Bagged up and weighed up and carted off? Kept in a tank? Or was it on ice? The smart ones, they stay in the holes. The stupid ones, they get kept on ice? Until someone gets hungry for space-seafood?"
"Shut up! Shut up about my mother!" the furious screaming was almost impossible to make out over the transmissions. Straight line bolts of space-laser fire sliced around the rim. Gavrilo yelped and dived deeper into the asteroid's crater. Red light burned his skin. Sharp stone shrapnel cut and bashed him, flung loose.
From the far end of the boulder, the Super Wizard From Space swept his hand toward the source of the red space-lasers, a gold arc of solar flare bursting from his hand and stretching across space to slash at the bottom of the rocket-ship. The weapons disintegrated instantly, a third of the ship melted and distorted in the fusion heat tossed at it.
Cephalo Pete's transmissions became panicked. Alarm bells were clamoring over his angry cries. "No! No! I know you! You can't do this! Gavrilo! I know your name, Gavrilo!"
"He iszzn't alone."
Gavrilo's blood went cold when he heard the new dripping voice, crystal clear but for the stretched out, vibrating consonants.
Some of the larger dark shapes in the asteroid fields stopped their erratic movements, sprouting wide clear wings that beat in a blur. The shapes moved in a circular pattern, rising from the cover of the asteroid belt to form a slow moving ring around the rocket-ship. In the light of the sun, the yellow-black striped on their massive misshapened bodies and spear-like stingers came into frightening view.
"You can go now, octopuszz. Leave the szzuper wizzzardszz to uszz... the Monszzter Beeszz of Queen Buzzz!"